Last and final chemo brain round 15

I've told yall a little bit about chemo brain. My last infusion hit me really hard. It's obviously been frustrating for me to have to deal with how much these drugs have taken a toll my entire body. That's their job. They don't discriminate. They wreak havoc just enough to hopefully clear the bad stuff away and keep enough of the good stuff to build upon during recovery. The worst was an incident that happened this weekend at a birthday party for one of Austin's sweet little buds at school.

Who's more into this pony ride??

There were carnival rides. Already a little stressful for our cautious little guy. Although he's a wild one, he likes his to be busy and loud within his predictable routines. I made him try them. Of course, he just whined a little bit. If he would've truly been scared I would never have strapped him into those cars traveling in a circle as fast as a herd of turtles, but he was just a little resistant, so I put on my best smile and cheerleader face and waved every time he came around the bend. He was even brave enough to ride the ponies (He held that close to me the whole time and kept saying 'I keep trying to fall off!' So cute). I hope he keeps some of this with him as he grows up...be the kid who has to go to the bathroom when his friends are sneaking shots of tequila from my cabinet, stays behind to eat some ice cream rather than drag racing a car on a dark street...a mommy can dream right?? Then it came to the boat rides. So, I'd already been through the routine of buckling him in and out of these rides with a very simple clip and hoop. Couldn't have been an easier contraption by design. Fool proof. I had already done it twice. Clipped him in the ride, but this time, when the ride was over, I stared at the darn clip like it was a rubix cube. Seriously, I couldn't unbuckle my baby from the ride. I knew it was easy and I had done it before, but I couldn't get my hands to do what I wanted them to do. It was humiliating. I had the to ask the attendant for help after all of the other kids were off the ride. I told her my brain just wasn't working right. She looked at me like I was joking.

Haha. This pic was taken as he was rounding the bend, not because I couldn't unbuckle him! The bottom is a close up of how simple this dang thing that defeated me really was...ugh.

So, no fair, but par for the course. BUT I will tell you one thing that's just plain rude...why didn't anyone tell me there were ways to order how to cut a sideburn before??? Apparently the terms are straight line or point? What? I can't blame this incident on chemo brain, just on being an oblivious dork who was trying to save a dime at supercuts and another clogged drain from my hair falling out. Look what the barber did to me?! haha. Thank goodness the rest should be falling out soon. She didn't even ask me if I wanted 'points,' she just did it. And they weren't even good points. They're uneven and high up. I think that cutting points without your client requesting points specifically is just rude. Especially on a girl. And a cancer patient girl. My mom keeps telling me I will not have one ounce of vanity left after all of this is said and done. haha. I doubt it, I already have plans to talk about how awesome my eyebrows are as soon as they are back in full force :)

So, made it through a very rocky first night home with chemo. Definitely went out with a bang. If I had a 3rd round to do in a couple of weeks, I just might end up on a tropical island somewhere instead. Praise God. This is it for me for now. I know that my cancer treatment path will be unpredictable, but I know that this leg of this part of the race is done. Thank you, thank you, thank you. We did it.

Win the Day!!
Jenn